People, including me, are just crazy.
I don’t know if it’s because it’s summer or what, but I have lost so many “friends” and listened to people, mostly guys, spew the most ridiculous shit. I know I graduated, but I haven’t changed - so I don’t think it’s me. Maybe it is, meh.
Oh well, I’ve learned something lately, a recurring trend, people have expiration dates says Jenny McCarthy (Love, Lust, and Faking it). It was difficult to grasp at first, especially since I had just “lost” my CBFF, but it’s true. I think I’ve been trying to salvage our friendship, but it’s been expired for a while.
There are people in your life who will only last as long as milk, simply fleeting in and out of your life. You know it’s going to end, it was fun while it lasted, but there was no real, lasting connection or bond. Others will last a little longer, like ice cream, they stay a while, make an impression, comfort you in your times of need, you have a really good time with them, and then they are gone - either you ate it all or it got frost bite, it’s done. Ice cream friendships endings are more difficult and sad. Then there are Twinkies, those are suppose to last forever, right? The friends you just can’t get rid of, and you don’t want to(: Note, they can’t get rid of you either. These are people you trust, love, respect. Those who teach you lessons, you can call whenever, and tell whatever! Not to mention you always have a great time when you are with each other and you can pick up right where you left off, not matter how long it’s been since you last spoke. And no matter how much milk or ice cream you have they will never make up for the place of a T.
It’s the Twinkies I live for, which is ironic because I have never actually eaten a Twinkie. But it’s so true, they make life a little easier. They are blessings in disguise, or clear wrappers. They may not seem extremely appealing, but when you are broke down, starving, in a desert, nothing else is going to help - those other things will spoil or need special care that you may not be able to give at the time - but a T, they’ve got your back, baby!
Either way, people have been crazy lately. It must be something in the air. Spoiling friendships, making people loopy, irritable, and unreliable. It sucks, but it’s life. And I like expiration dates, they make sense.
Back on the Shelf
I am finally able to put Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison back on the bookshelf. I am sad it’s over! I want to keep reading it.
A quote from the book, Guitar says to Milkman, “Listen baby, people do funny things. Specially us. The cards are stacked against us and just trying to stay in the game, stay alive in the game, makes us do funny things. Things we can’t help. Things that make us hurt one another. We do’t even know why. But look here, don’t carry it inside and don’t give it to nobody else. Try to understand it, but if you can’t just forget it and keep yourself strong, man.”
Any suggestions for good books to read? I have a few I want to start, but they are the typical romantic, girly ones - I have a craving for something else. I heard “The Help” was good and I want to read that, but any other suggestions?
What does Porn and Disney have in common?
I got an in person interview! Next Wednesday at 11am(:
Now I just need to figure out something to wear - eek! I have nothing.
Giving Good Phone
I have a phone interview at three! Eeep. I’m nervous - I have never had a phone interview before. I normally am able to calm down when I’m driving to the interview, but since I’m not driving I’m not able to calm down that way… And if you know me at all you know I have anxiety.
So sitting here waiting is just killing me. I’ll be fine when I get on the phone, but the waiting just sucks! And this is my first one so I don’t even know what to expect. It’s like an open book/at home test. I can write down/view the answers but I don’t have the comfort of being there - does that even make sense?
Well, I’m going to go research the company and look over my notes again. Wish me luck! Yay me.
I wrote a post it note and stuck it on my wall, “remember… relax and smile(:”
I started a post on this like five months ago but for some reason or another never completed or posted it. So here I go again…
Why do people find it necessary to ask me about my relationship status and when I say I’m single they proceed to ask me, “Why is a beautiful girl like you single?” What? What does this question even mean? Can I not be single? Does being single cripple me in some way? Am I less of a person because I don’t have a boyfriend? Is it automatically assumed that I’m on the prowl for a guy, but for some crazy reason cannot find one? What are these people getting at? What I ask.
The more I think about it the more annoyed I get at that question. If you are using it as a pick up line - it absolutely sucks! Why am I single you ask? Because I fucking want to be. Can one not be alone and enjoy life? Shit. If I wanted to date you, I’d talk to you - not sit there half ignoring the ignorant shit you are spewing out of your mouth. How about getting to know me and then understanding why I’m single. This guy the other week had the balls (or the stupidity, rather) to ask me if I was a lesbian because I told him I was not interested in having a boyfriend (aka I am not at all, in the least bit, interested in you). No, I am not a lesbian, I have no sexual or intimate desire to be with a girl. Just because I’m not actively seeking a guy does not mean I’m gay!
And when I’m at the gas station pumping gas into a little red can and this old ass man sticks his head out his raggedy ass truck window asking about, “Is your husband going to mow the lawn?” “I’m not married…” “Oh, is your boyfriend going to mow the lawn?” “No, I’m going to mow the lawn” “What’s a girl like you doing mowing the lawn?” I really need to learn to just say I’m married, engaged, taken, whatever when random people ask me questions. But really, I can walk. I can mow the yard. I can pump gas. I can change a light bulb and fix things and change the oil and a flat tire on my car. I have helped build a deck and put on a roof on a house. I have boobs, but I can do all of these things. I enjoy being independent and single. So I’d really appreciate if everyone stopped asking me why I was single.
Then family members and friends - “Have you ever thought of going on a dating site?” “So, do you have a boyfriend this week?” “Are you bringing a date to the wedding?” When are you getting married?” No, no, no I’m not going to date someone just so I can bring him to your wedding, and never! I was going to add that my family and friends should stop asking because I’d tell them when I finally have a boyfriend. Then I realized - I probably won’t. Not right away, I’d keep him my little secret - if for no other reason, to piss people off.
Don’t get me wrong, one day I’d love family. I want kids, whether that involves a husband/long-time-lover/boyfriend/whatever or if it’s just me and (a) kid(s) it doesn’t matter. My whole point to this whole rant is - there is nothing in this world that you have to have a man (or women) in your life for. I would love to feel that spark and have someone to lay with at night - I do believe in love. But I also believe in independence. And I know me, I still have got a lot of changing left in me, so finding a guy or seeking one out just makes no sense in my life right now.
So yes, I am single. And I am alive, breathing, and well. No worries everyone - I shall survive(:
This is a picture of my dog Maddie, I got her when I was in third grade. My mom was helping out in the classroom and her and my teacher were talking about how she just got a dog, his name was Chipper. My mom left during lunch and got another puppy from the litter. She brought her into class and surprised me! All the kids in class were helping come up with names for her - all of them were stupid! Finally I named her Madeline - LINE as in you draw a line, not lynn. She was put down this morning): It’s going to be really weird walking into my house without her there. She was always an annoying dog, following everyone, laying on the furniture when she wasn’t allowed, running up to you when you said “Come here Chloe, or Belle, or Fiona…” Every name was her name. She will be greatly missed!
Baltimore, Maryland. Inner Harbor.
My friend and I stopped here on our way back to Charlotte from Philadelphia. I love Inner Harbor. So pretty! But I’m bummed that all the big cities are up north! I love the cities but I cannot deal with the cold weather, and it sucks. Ugh. I want to live in a real city that doesn’t get freezing cold in the winter - meh.